Friday, August 30, 2013

Send Miley Cyrus to Syria

I believe that, rather than bombing Syria over the Assad regime's use of chemical weapons, the United States should send Miley Cyrus over there instead. In fact, I started a petition on the White House web site, asking President Barack Obama to do just that. If you are so wiling, I would appreciate it if you took a moment to sign my petition on We the People.

Sending Miley Cyrus to Syria would accomplish what I believe are four important objectives for American foreign policy in the 21st century.
  1. Her endless, overdone twerking will punish President Bashar al-Assad and his regime for their apparent use of chemical weapons against dissidents within Syria;
  2. It will provide an adequate deterrent against Iran, North Korea, or any other rogue nation from using weapons of mass destruction against unarmed civilians;
  3. It will rid the American people of the Miley Cyrus menace once and for all; and
  4. It will accomplish all of this with minimal risk of American causalities - other than Miley Cyrus, of course.
There are those who argue that this is an extreme measure. Some of my friends have even argued that it might be considered a war crime for the United States to do such a thing. However, after a great deal of reflection, I believe that it is a risk we as a nation must take.

I hope that you will join me in encouraging President Obama to send Miley Cyrus to Syria than bombing them. My petition to the White House is available on-line here.
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